Virginia Tech...Our Lives After

I was getting back to blogging before the Virginia Tech tragedy occurred. Then it felt like I'd been kicked in the gut, I didn't want to write. A week later I felt better, but it had all been said. Still, I needed to address it to continue.

We're painfully aware--and saturated from media exposure--of the incident at VT. Though we live a half-hour from Tech and were indirectly affected, it was too close to home. We realized we were only a degree or two away in separation. Spencer's high school band teacher was friends with Ryan Clark, the RA who died. She was interviewed on Talk of the Nation on NPR from her office during band class. Emerson's soccer coach is a Tech student, he called off practice and went home. We have friends who work at Tech and others who know professors who lost students in the tragedy. Another friend knows a State Trooper who analyzed the crime scene. My client had a dental appointment in Blacksburg the day after the tragedy, the dental practice lost two patients. We were sad and overwhelmed and went through the motions of every day life.Homes and businesses in Floyd, particularly in Christiansburg and Blacksburg, have displayed orange and maroon ribbons, flowers and signs saying "Our thoughts and prayers are with Virginia Tech." Cars have VT flags waving proudly from their windows in support, an activity usually reserved for fall football season. It's impossible to go anywhere without a reminder.

My husband had a gig at Tech last week for an awards dinner for the School of Engineering, it had been on the calendar for months. Emerson asked if he had to go. We explained rationally that everything would be fine. Scott said he'd call when he arrived on campus and would call again before he left. I found myself anxiously awaiting his call. I knew logically that everything was okay and I was so proud of him that he was playing music for people that needed to heal. Yet, I found myself watching the clock and waiting for the darn phone to ring. Finally, he called. We told him to have a great gig. He reported that he saw some students throwing a frisbee, a 'normal' scene for a college campus, it made him feel better.

We're getting back to our busy lives. We may talk about what happened when we bump into people, but we'd prefer to not bring it up and that it became a bad memory. We're still in a bit of shock and disbelief. This will be with us for a long time, I'm afraid.

[As the Tech tragedy unfolded, we lost power due to high winds throughout our area. We were without power for 48 hours. It caught us by surprise, AEP had recently cut down trees that surrounded the lines on our farm and all the way up our road (we're near the end) giving us a false sense of security. With a battery-operated radio (and kerosene lamps), we listened to the news conferences from Tech.]

Oh, Those Ladybugs!

Oh, those ladybugs! They like white walls, they like to be warm and they swarm and collect by the hundreds. During the day they are everywhere; crawling up your coffee cup, landing on the rim of your glasses, the book you are reading, and on the table where you are paying bills. At night, they disappear--only to seemingly multiply and reappear the next day. They have infiltrated Floyd County, they have infiltrated my house. If you don't have them, then I must have your fair share. Feel free to come over and take some home by the bucket load.

Supposedly they are a beneficial insect, if we could just get them to go back outside. Certainly they came from that direction, right? Meanwhile, I do as a friend suggested. I vacuum the dead ladybug bodies and let the ones that are alive, live to crawl another day.

To read more about the wonderful MALB (Multicolored Asian Lady Beetles) go here.

Time Management & Rachael Ray

In the last two weeks--can't believe it's been almost that long since I've posted, again--there has been much going on. I attended two more meetings (three including one today--an all day required meeting) and written a Quarterly Report (for Medicaid) for my job. I'm struggling with time management or the lack thereof. I had bought a book called Getting Things Done by David Allen (think that's the author), but guess what--the Seller said it was shipped, but never notified me that they had credited my account. I never received the book. I bought folders to begin a system to get myself organized and ready to begin new things.

My husband's music store, The Pickin' Porch, is mentioned (complete with a photo of an interior wall, street and website address!) in an article in the April issue of Every Day with Rachael Ray magazine about The Crooked Road (Virginia's Heritage Music Trail). The article begins with Floyd--our little town is in the media yet again.

I have blog posts swirling in my head, one nature-related post has been scratched down in a notebook so I don't forget. As of tomorrow, I'm done with the big meetings and reports for at least another quarter. I can get back to my "normal" life, whatever normal is! I can begin blogging again and sow the peas and spinach in my garden, if it's not too late.

Another Roll Call

The anniversary of the war came and went a few days ago. I called our Congressman, Rick Boucher (D-VA), and expressed my concern over the continuing war and asked that he vote against new funds and deployment out of Iraq with a set date.
When the war began, Spencer (the oldest son) had just turned 13. He was a young teen with lighthearted hopes and dreams. He recently celebrated his 17th birthday. I never would have dreamed that this ugly war would have been going on four years later...with no real end in sight. The war has subtly, and quite boldly, colored his thoughts, his dreams, his future.

Attached to the war is a mountain of debt for our country to climb as years go by. Spencer, and his younger brother, Emerson, their friends and others they will never know from their generation--and quite likely their children's generation--will work towards conquering that debt and dealing with the aftermath of war.

I walked into the family room just in time to catch the roll call on the News Hour with Jim Lehrer on PBS. Thank goodness we don't catch the program every day as it never fails to bring tears to my eyes. Beneath the photo of a deceased soldier is their name, age, rank, the division of the Armed Services and the name of the town the person was from. Tonight I learned that someone named Emerson lost his life. Not my son, but someone else's. It's not a name you see every day, it caught me by surprise and made me catch my breath. Tonight I learned that two men who were 39 and 41 years of age recently died in Iraq. I don't know what hurts more; learning that a young kid of just 19 died in the war or the adult near my age who died and probably left behind a wife and children.

Why is this war now in Year 5? When will we collectively rise up and scream "Enough!"?

[Photos courtesy of Creative Commons.]

Middle of the Night

The last three weeks I've been awake in the middle of the night. Not my favorite time of day. The first week was due to my sons' illness, but the last two were my fault. Even if you're just plain done with a stupid head cold, that nagging cough grabs you before dawn. The middle of the night might be useful to me if I could drag myself out of bed, but I always will myself back to sleep. Sometimes it works quickly and other times I meander through recent scenes and dark alleys of my life, though I try to focus on Nothing. At some point I consider that I should jot down my thoughts or go to the computer to pound the keyboard. I effortlessly come up with good stuff at 3:50 a.m. Numerous witty and insightful essays have been written in my head before I wake up for good--when they disappear.

[VanGogh's Starry Night courtesy of Creative Commons.]

Spring has Sprung!

Yes indeed, today is the Vernal Equinox. The first day of Spring.

No matter what weather we have in the next few weeks, we have turned a corner and the winter of 06-07 is officially behind us. It wasn't a bad winter though it had its moments. We often wondered during December and way into January, if we'd have any winter. When winter arrived late, it brought with it cold, ice and power outages. Yippee.

But here we are, two-thirds through March and it's a fresh, new season. Hallelujah!

[Forsythia photo courtesty of Creative Commons until I can borrow my son's camera while mine is being repaired. We have our own forsythia to photograph, but this works for now.]

St. Patrick's Day and more

March hasn't been so hot for my writing process, but it's been great for being sick. Spencer caught the flu when I returned from Georgia, then Emerson followed with a cold and 103.7 degree fever for three nights accompanied by lingering congestion and cough. I succumbed to a cold after taking care of them. Somehow Scott managed to stay healthy, despite my waking him up at night when hacking and reaching for yet another delicious cough drop. Our client is healthy, his bedroom is downstairs and he has less exposure to our germs. Today we've turned the corner, I feel almost healthy.

St. Patrick's Day is a national holiday in my mind, we all wore green today and I didn't have to ask. Scott arrived home from work with a Guinness for us to quaff with the homemade pizza he made. I love St. Patrick's Day because I believe I have an Irish soul. I'm 100% German (my great-greats hail from Germany), but as my husband the history buff tells me, long before the land was Germany it was occupied by Celts. This works for me. The local PBS station and IFC (Independent Film Channel) played Irish themed shows; we taped "Visions of Ireland" for the next time I need an Ireland "fix," and a great movie starring Richard Harris, "The Field". We considered going out to celebrate the holiday, but with snow flurries on and off all day, we chose to stay inside and keep warm.

While eating pizza, we cheered on VCU (Virginia Commonwealth) in the NCAA tourney, but no upset last night. Tomorrow we'll see how UVA and VT do, whether they'll advance or not. We enjoy watching sports, but we're selective. We like football, the NCAA basketball tournament, the Tour de France, and the Olympics. My family is from Indiana, so we have a long history of attending or watching The Indy 500. The last 20 years we've watched during the annual Memorial weekend relative-a-thon.

I make no promises, but I'll get back on the productive blogging track I was on earlier this year. I'm expecting the book Getting Things Done in the mail any day. We'll talk about that subject in future posts.

[St. Patrick at Croagh Patrick, driving the snakes out of Ireland. Photo by Pat O'Connor.]

My Oldest is 17!

Spencer William was 17 years old today. As birthdays go, his was low-key though we saw a movie yesterday afternoon (taking him out of school at lunch). Emerson, our client and I saw Bridge to Terabithia, and Scott and Spencer saw Wild Hogs. Spencer had no special requests for the cake, the meal or for presents--quite a change from when he was just 7 or 11, or even 15, so I made the same chocolate cream cheese bunny cake that he's had since he was three years old. It was still a hit. Spencer is ready to begin taking driver's ed through an online class. Then, hold your breath, his parents will teach behind-the-wheel. We had to get permission from the school to home school driver's ed since Spencer now attends public school. He missed driver's ed because he enrolled the spring semester of his Sophomore year--after it was taught fall semester. On Friday we're taking his birthday checks and opening a checking account for him. I meant to do this last year--where did that year go?

Billy Joel and Family, Too

It's been a week since my last post. I was on a roll then faltered in late February. Sometimes life is like that; you move forward at a quick pace only to realize that you need a breather now and then.

I celebrated March 1--the first day of the new month I was looking forward to--by attending a Billy Joel concert in Atlanta with my sister. It wasn't planned that way, but my sister called the week before to say she'd won free tickets on a radio station to the concert. Believe it or not, I turned her down when she offered me the ticket. I didn't think I could get away; I had a work-related meeting on March 2 and wondered how my busy husband could juggle taking care of our client with giving guitar lessons at his music store. It was my husband who said "You're going, you need a break," and called back my sister to say his wife would take that ticket after all. He is a smart guy, I'm so glad I married him. When I mentioned the concert to my program manager, she said "You'd turn down a Billy Joel concert for a stupid meeting?" What meeting?

I drove to Georgia with Emerson along for company. We drove through heavy fog and rain, but safely arrived at my sister's home. The concert was that night and it was outstanding. I haven't been to a concert in two decades, but from my foggy memory this was up there with the best. He played most all of his hits; I forgot how many Billy Joel tunes I had known, listened and danced to over the years. There were even a few that I didn't know like "Vienna" from 1971 (when I was all of nine years old). Emerson, now 11 1/2, had no clue who Billy Joel was and asked about him. I couldn't describe him nor his music, just that he had 30 hit songs. Emerson had never heard of him since they don't play much Billy Joel on NPR. When I want to hear something more upbeat, I turn the dial to 98.7 (Simon). Their motto is We Play Everything, except they've never played a Billy Joel song now that I'm thinking about it, so they aren't really playing everything, are they? They play a mix of popular hits from the 60's through today and put together a random shuffle of songs you'd never hear anywhere else. The songs that you forgot you used to like; songs from your high school and college days, and when the boys were toddlers, and all the years in between and since. But no Billy Joel.

Emerson and I had a lazy Friday in Georgia with my sister (his Aunt Laura) going out to lunch at my brother-in-law Steve's restaurant and a low-key night at home having dinner with my niece and nephews. Emerson had big fun playing hide-and-seek and other games with his cousins who are still the age that they enjoy playing games. This isn't to say that Emerson's older brother, Spencer, is a big poop at almost-17, but it is true that he has moved beyond playing hide-and-seek. It happens.

On Saturday, we woke up to a rooster's crow. My sister and brother-in-law live in a new subdivision in Gainesville, but their property has a farm (of sorts) behind them. The guy keeps cows and several roosters; apparently one of the roosters was kicked out of the rooster clan and now resides in my sister's back yard. Hearing the crow reminded me of our beloved rooster, Fox, who died last May and lived on our farm for three years. After a while you tune out early morning crowing as it becomes something your brain accepts as normal and you sleep until the alarm clock turns on. This day, the rooster's crow was a natural wake-up call. Emerson and I got ready to leave as my sister and her family got ready to drop off my nephews at their Tae Kwan Do class.

It was a brief visit and we were ready to get home. The drive was uneventful, we had great weather, and Floyd County's hills never looked so good--not to mention my husband's handsome face.

[Sorry, I blew it. Didn't take pictures the entire trip. Billy Joel photo courtesy of: http://pomomusings.com/2007/03/02/billy-joel-at-atlantas-philips-arena/]

A Fresh Start (recovering from February)

Last week I personally declared that March 1 is a new start. It feels good just to think about it. Things were going smoothly and positive changes were made--then February came along. I usually go with the flow, at least most of the time, but these particular stresses accumulated. I became weary, melancholy, and uninspired. Yuck.

It began when our almost 14 year-old pet turtle died on January 28. True, this didn't happen in February, but close enough. A couple of us at our house have grieved for Donald, myself included. This was on the heels of our oldest Border Collie, Jack, getting injured which required surgery. He was kept inside and endured ten days of large antibiotic pills.

On Thursday, February 1, I received a frantic phone call from the home office of my former mortgage company. At 10:30 a.m. they said that I had to send via my dusty files to them via overnight courier that afternoon for an audit the following Monday. Sure. Take into consideration: 1. I hadn't closed a loan in over six months and had closed my business before Thanksgiving; 2. I brought the files home the night before after being told two days earlier to possibly expect an audit in the next month; and 3. FedEx picks up at 2:30 pm in Floyd. The day was a whirlwind of Stress with a capital S. When I came back home that night (with mush brain and zero energy), we discovered our client's bedroom door ajar and his parakeet cage opened upside down on the floor. Apparently, our outdoor cat snuck in when we left, there was nothing left of the keet but a couple of yellow feathers.

On Friday, February 2, I received a frantic email: Where's this? Where's that? This loan doesn't have X. I replied that I didn't have those items. They didn't give me time to review the files nor did they indicate any urgency when they first called on Monday. They asked for documents that were not needed in previous audits. It didn't sound good; I was mentally swirling around in the mortgage world and worrying about an audit for my now defunct business. I had a new job (since last June), but I found myself concerned about mortgage loans again.

That was how February began, it continued from there.

Last Thursday, February 22, my son's beloved blue parakeet, Birdy, died of natural causes. It was most likely from getting too cold during the ice storm on Tuesday, February 13th which left us without power until the evening on Friday, February 16th.

Between the 1st and the 22nd we lost more animals. Our comical duck trio 'disappeared' one by one when the pond froze solid in late January. There were two drakes and one hen, then a few days later just one drake and one hen, then soon thereafter only the lone black hen. She held her own for another week until, she, too, disappeared. We tried to pen them up at night in the old hen house to protect them, but it didn't work. The door flew open in the brisk winter wind and they escaped twice.

I've mentioned the power outage. When the electricity occasionally goes out all is calm and peaceful in the house, there is no appliance humming. This time there was constant production during daylight hours to generate heat and/or light. It was cold. It was so cold that the water in cat's dish in the mudroom was frozen Friday morning. It was warmer in the kitchen, when the kerosene heater came on Friday night the digital thermometer registered 43 degrees. That was the warmest room in the house.

It's a fact that we had the most memorable Valentine's Day in our family's history; the holiday fell during the outage. We ate an Indian dinner prepared by lamp light and afterwards huddled around the wood stove, reading together by the same lamp. We heard a loud crack--thinking it was another tree breaking from the weight of the ice--when the encased hearth mirror fell in large pieces to the floor. This caused the lamp to fall, it landed on the rug and my husband quickly picked it up. Miraculously, the lamp did not break and nothing caught on fire.

When the power came back on Friday evening February 16th we were jubilant and exhausted by having been so cold. We were grateful it was only for three days. When we had a brief storm of freezing rain last night, we filled up the bath tub and a couple pans just in case. We all said the same thing, "I hope the power stays on." No desire to repeat that experience any time soon.

I haven't called to ask about the audit. I'm not in the mortgage business any more; the mortgage broker life is behind me for good.

There were some highlights this month, we had friends over last Friday night and have enjoyed a couple of warmer days in the upper 50's since the outage. Jack has healed and our remaining pets appear to be fine. But overall, February has left me anticipating March in a big way and eager for a fresh, new start.

How is your year going? Any setbacks and/or progress made?

Thursday 13 #6

1. I just clicked off on a open window and all my tabs closed--including my draft of this post. I was on #10! I hadn't hit "Save as Draft" anywhere along the way. Aaaargh!

2. February has been one lesson after another and full of lovely experiences. On Thursday, March 1, I am giving myself a fresh start. I'll develop a new, good habit and lose a less desirable one.

3. Less than one month to the first day of Spring--on March 20th.

4. Tomorrow night two friends are coming over for dinner, first time we've had anyone over in who-knows-how-long. We are celebrating the birthday of one of them.

5. The 79th annual Academy Awards are on Sunday. This past week husband and I enjoyed watching The Goodbye Girl (1977) on AMC with Richard Dreyfuss and Marsha Mason. Dreyfuss won for Best Actor and was the youngest in this category (then age 29--which means he's almost 60!), until Adrien Brody won in 2002 for The Pianist, he was a few months younger.

6. We heard on the radio this morning that Senator Ted Kennedy (D-MA) is 75 years young today. My husband and I said "75?!" at the same time, then both remarked that we're getting older.

7. My half-birthday is this Sunday, I'll be 44 1/2. We don't celebrate half-birthdays, but we acknowledge them. It's a reminder to make progress with your life because time is fleeting and passing by

8. There is an unintentional 'numbers or age theme' running through this post.

9. Last week we lost power for 68+ hours in the ice storm. Previous record was 57 hours from Hurricane Jeanne in September 2004. It was cold enough in our mudroom to freeze the cat's water in the dish. When power came back on in the kitchen, the digital thermostat registered 43. Brrr. The kitchen is located in the half of the house with a wood stove.

10. My TT post last week was delayed until after comments were closed thanks to the power outage.

11. Listen to the song Big Chief by Professor Longhair, it's often played for Mardi Gras. You'll find yourself doing the chair boogie. A better song by the same guy, is Going to the Mardi Gras. My husband dug it out of his collection to play for us Tuesday night, but I can't find a listenable link.

12. I'm trying to resurrect an almost dead jade plant. Apparently I didn't water it much the last few months, but the family is fed three squares every darn day (four or five meals for Spencer, the nearly 17 year-old son).

13. Whew! Made it to the end. Only took me two hours+. The second post went by quickly compared to the first draft. Want to begin upgrading and changing my blog site, but still in the thinking stage. Just learned that TT is retiring until someone else purchases the rights. Another lesson learned! Have a great week.

Thursday 13 site.

Less is More

An old familiar saying is 'less is more'. We don't usually arrive at this gem until we're older and wiser. We age every day, when wisdom occurs is up to you. I didn't appreciate this until several years ago. Ever since, we've been trying to pare back and learn a new habit.

Old friends of ours have a One-in, One-out rule that works for them. When they buy something new, an old version must go--no exceptions. This can be a 'no brainer', when you buy a new stove to replace an old one (that was going to cost as much to repair as to buy new). You need one, the old model goes out the door when the new one is delivered (unless a charity picks it up later, but it still leaves your house). Try as we might, in general, this rule does not work for us.

What works is having an occasional 'purge' (or moving every two years). Here's an example. We buy good, used books at LaPointe's Used Books in Floyd or online through half.com or AbeBooks.com. We seldom purchase new. We read and accumulate, resulting in overflowing stacks of books on shelves and beside the bed. The stacks tip over so we take a large box--or two or three--to LaPointe's where we earn credit in exchange for the books. We are paring down to our favorite, most essential books that we can not live without, the books we truly want to pack and move yet again when we are ready to sell the farm. The 'purge' (rhymes with surge) works with clothes, bathroom drawers and so forth. Until then, we're learning less really is more.

To Rise Above

I had an experience yesterday that left me foaming at the mouth and conjuring the many ways I could react in my defense to the person who caused these feelings.

I took deep breaths, I drank a beer (it was early evening), I walked in quick paces around the house trying to rid myself of negative energy. I talked to my husband and shared my thoughts with him about what I wanted to say and do. He understood. But he also knew, as I did, that I should take the high road. The other person did not, but I would.

I poured myself a hot bath and grabbed a magazine to read. After sharing more wisecrack remarks with my husband, I got in the tub to sulk and soak. I took a couple more deep breaths, the hot water felt soothing.

I hadn't been in the tub for a minute when it happened. The perfect response, "Thank you." Yes, thank you! I felt light and happy. I sat up straight. The anger was gone as quickly as it had consumed me, I couldn't believe it. I mentally thanked the person for giving me an energy boost to clean the house and for this lovely experience to rise above. Through the closed bathroom door I shouted to my husband that I was happy again. I took another deep breath and exhaled. I felt peaceful. A lesson learned and a moment of Zen. Someone had been rude and mean-spirited to me and I rose above it. Wahoo!

Thursday 13 #5

1. We lost power Tuesday night at 10:30 pm after it had been blinking for two hours (ice storm).

2. My husband and sons made Bittersweet Chocolate Pancakes with Roasted Pear Butter and Maple Pear Syrup for Valentine's breakfast, thanks to a stove with gas burners. We also gave each other bars of dark chocolate (naturally). I'm writing from my husband's music store in town where we seldom lose electricity.

3. The electricity is due to come back on by Friday night.

4. Last night we huddled around the woodstove at home, wearing hats and our warmest Pjs, with blankets thrown over us and reading by the light of the Aladdin kerosene lamp on the hearth. We heard a loud crack, different from a tree snapping under the weight of ice, followed by the encased hearth mirror falling in pieces and causing the kerosene lamp to also fall and land on the rug. It was like watching a small ball of fire fall in slow motion, my husband quickly picked up the lamp--amazingly still in one piece--and put it aside. The rug did not catch fire, we were fortunate. After that we decided to have another sip of red wine, I believe it was merlot. We laughed nervously; this was a Valentine's Day we'll never forget.

5. Ice storms are deceptively beautiful; everything is transformed into the appearance of sparkling cut glass. Our deck furniture, house and cars have shiny icicle fringes along edges. Trees and bushes particularly, but even ordinary objects such as grass, barbed wire fence and sign posts are turned into glittering works of art.

6. Using a battery powered radio, I briefly listened to the news this a.m. Is anyone concerned about Iran? It hasn't been resolved whether President Bush is sending more troops to Iraq, yet the news is abuzz with eerily similar discussions on Iran to those of Iraq, now four years ago.

7. Four years ago feels like it could be ten. I had turned 40, my husband wasn't yet 40 and our sons were almost 13 and 7 1/2. We were in a different phase of our lives raising sons who were still boys. We hadn't yet built our addition nor started down the path to become Foster Care Providers.

8. In years past, I've started tomato plants from seeds on February 15. My target this year is March 1.

9. A month ago today we had a new record high of 67 degrees in nearby Blackburg, but believe it only reached 65 here in Floyd. Was that really just a month ago?

10. It's now Saturday 2/17. I went to the gym with my client yesterday so he could work and I could shower. Hot water never felt so good, it was very cold in the house Thursday night and sleep was hard to find.
11. Our power came back on at 6:44 pm last night for a new record of 68+ hours without power. Our previous record was 57 hours when remnants of Hurricane Jeanne passed through in September 2004. Emerson and I did the jig of joy and promptly went throughout the house turning up the heat to unfreeze water pipes. Luckily, none of our pipes burst.

12. If it wasn't for being so darned cold, we would have enjoyed the power break as we have in the past. The absence of electrical humming from appliances allows the house to be truly quiet and peaceful. My good friend Laura lives off the grid and therefore never experiences the magic and thrill of a power outage.

13. I'll finish The Poisonwood Bible today, I just have the last two short chapters to read. I'm sorry to come to the end of this book, but I've got good ones waiting in my stack beside the bed.

My Thursday 13 #4. Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leave a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Don't Hesitate

I ran across this quote today in the back of a magazine. Let this be food for thought.

"There are many persons ready to do what is right because in their hearts they know it is right. But they hesitate, waiting for the other fellow to make the first move - and he, in turn, waits for you." - Marian Anderson (1897-1993), African American Opera Singer

Whatever your current interest in activism may be and how you choose to champion your cause, Ms. Anderson reminds us to get started. Stand up, speak out, mail a letter, send an email, write a check to support your cause in an amount you can afford. Your voice, your action matters. You are not alone. We are not alone. Don't hesitate.

[Photo of Marian Anderson by Richard Avedon, 1955.]

$2.9 Trillion Dollars

On Monday of this week, President Bush unveiled a four-volume, 2,500 page, $2.9 trillion dollar budget for the U.S. Government. My initial thought was to the environment, "How many copies are printed? What a waste of paper; they must recycle since it's the government." I repeated the $2.9 trillion dollar figure in my head.

How much is 2.9 trillion dollars? Round it up to 3 to make it easier. $3,000,000,000,000.00. Twelve zeroes to the left of the decimal point. A trillion is a million million dollars. In Jim Loy's article, A Trillion Dollars, he states "It will take me more than 30 years to count (out loud) to one billion and more than 30,000 years to count to one trillion." In other words, 2.9 trillion is a number too high to count and hard to comprehend. My desk calculator only goes to twelve digits--as high as 300 million. It, too, can not compute a trillion dollars.

Of the immense sum, $145.2 billion goes to war, mostly for Iraq and Afghanistan (from October 1) with another $99.6 billion dollars for the remainder of the current fiscal year (to September 30). This is a humdinger of a total. $244.8 billion dollars spent on war for 12 months or $20,400,000,000.00 per month. As you turn a new calendar page, another $20.4 billion of taxpayer dollars goes goodbye. If we collectively decided enough was enough, could we save it and apply it to debt or redirect how the $245 billion dollars was spent?

Mr. David Leonhardt suggests a few ideas in his New York Times article "What $1.2 Trillion Can Buy", he writes:

"Treating heart disease and diabetes, would probably cost about $50 billion a year. The remaining 9/11 Commission recommendations — held up in Congress partly because of their cost — might cost somewhat less. Universal preschool would be $35 billion. In Afghanistan, $10 billion could make a real difference. At the National Cancer Institute, annual budget is about $6 billion." Earlier he mentions that more money could be contributed to the reconstruction of New Orleans.

The President's budget is part of a five year plan to have a balanced budget by 2012. He assumes we'll quit spending money in Iraq (hopefully he's right this time) and various other expenditures. But I ask, can you take five years to balance your family budget or would that land you in Bankruptcy and/or Divorce Court? At our house, if we can't afford something we don't buy it. Sure, we've made plenty of mistakes over the years. When we purchased items on credit, the end result is a future bill that must be paid. We've learned our lesson and work to eliminate our consumer debt, but how about the government? Can it wait to reduce its debt? Can we really afford the war?

Thursday 13 #4

1. Just came back from ice skating with Emerson, this pond has a fresh 2-3" of powdery snow on top. We skated through it--like ski skating. I made Emerson a cup of hot cocoa and warmed up chai tea for myself that I'd made earlier.

2. Our Muscovy duck's (hen) final appearance was on Monday. Since the pond has been frozen solid we went from having a duck trio to, sadly, none. We miss them. We tried to shut the ducks in the barn hen house two nights but the mini door blew open in the wind. If we're going to have more poultry, we have to make sure the hen house is safe and secure.

3. Yesterday was a Snow Day, the third (?) for Floyd County schools. I made another creative pot of homemade soup, this one was so good I wrote down the recipe. Some of my creations never make it to an index card.

4. A week ago today I was in a dither organizing mortgage loan files from the first six months of 2006 for an audit this past Monday. It wasn't pretty. I haven't heard from the lender, nor do I care to, really. I passed two previous audits without problems and I have a different life now as a Foster Care Provider.

5. I took our client to the pet store last Friday to replace the parakeet that bit the dust the night before (at the end of an already crappy day). Things are back to usual. Our client is going home tomorrow for the weekend. We are all--client and us--looking forward to the break.

6. I'm making homemade macaroni and cheese tonight. I also made it for dinner the evening of my first Thursday 13 on January 18. Perhaps I should post the recipe.

7. Scott, my husband, got his confirmation from the May LEAF festival this past week. He's been hired for four days of entertainment, we' are excited.

8. I balanced my checkbook this morning. Yesterday I entered information from our DirecTV and State Farm insurance accounts into mycheckfree.com, now I can pay more bills online. I find it to be a time saver and like choosing what day bills get paid.

9. I'm reading The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver. She had a speaking engagement in Floyd last year but I wasn't able to attend. I don't know how to use underline in Blogger, another thing to learn. I have a stack of books by my bed to read that is more than a foot tall.

10. I read a tip this past week to help us bloggers avoid aching backs and shoulders. Think "earlobes, shoulders, hips." They should be in alignment from top to bottom--or lobe to hip.
11. I made two homemade cards this week, one for an anniversary, the other for an upcoming birthday. Once in a while I feel like creating cards and have a big time doing it. Happy Valentine's Day everyone.

12. It's been so cold this past week. We heat with wood and electric. Our January electric bill was 25% higher than last year--and half of January was warm. Apparently AEP (Appalachian Electric Power) had a significant rate increase last fall, they surely needed more of my hard earned money.

13. Check out Colleen Redman's site, she's been a 13er for a long-time and blogging for even longer. She is also a fellow Floydian and discovered Floyd before we did.

The Thursday 13 site here.

Snow Day Soup

Before we went to bed last night school was cancelled for Floyd County. We received 3" of snow (it mostly covered the ground) followed by a glazing of fine hail. I called the Vet this a.m. to reschedule another day to take out Jack's stitches. I knew (from previous harrowing experiences) that the minivan would not make it across the hilly 1.5 mile dirt road we lived off of before hitting the cleared main paved road. Hubby had taken the 4-wheel drive Jeep into town to get to his store.

I took this picture of lamb's ear in the front garden bed, still decidedly green, a little bit of snow won't phase it. Recall that it was just three weeks ago on January 15th that we had a record high, then there were several hollyhocks a foot tall. Poor, confused flowers. Truth is the weather (climate?) was confused. No matter how good a 65 degree day feels in mid-January, it is just plain wrong for our neck of the woods.

The photo to the right is the top of a small table on the deck, the design reminded me of a Zen or Chinese symbol.

Here's the recipe for tonight's meal: Snow Day Soup.
1 28 oz. can of diced tomatoes
2 15.5 oz. cans of black beans, well drained
2 carrots, diced
1 large onion, diced
1 10 oz. package of frozen spinach (could also use collards or kale w/rib removed)
Garlic, minced - to taste
3 c. water

I would have also added frozen or canned corn and a sweet potato (diced) but happened to be out of both. I thought about cooking one large chicken breast, dicing it, and adding in place of the beans. We're making cornbread to serve with the soup tonight. What are you having for dinner?

Taming of the Shrew

This is not what you're thinking, it's not about the play by Shakespeare. This is about a real, live shrew in our house. Emerson thought at first that it was "a fat mouse," as he put it. It was under our kitchen cabinet this afternoon where we had a mouse a few months ago. We finally got that one out and relocated it to the great outdoors. Emerson removed the trim from under the cabinet and thought he could get it. The mouse that turned out to be a shrew, ran out the other side around Emerson and along the edge of the kitchen. It disappeared under the dishwasher into a hole we never knew existed. Emerson proceeded to dismantle the bottom front of the dishwasher revealing the secret hideout full of wires, but no shrew. He had truly disappeared. Apparently other mice or similar critters had been here before the shrew, from what was visible on the floor underneath. When Emerson tells his story tonight, Scott will probably say "That's life living in the country," as he said before a time or two.

In the last 6 1/2 years of living in our Floyd County farmhouse, we've experienced and shared our living space with numerous critters--not including pets. In separate incidences we've had three black snakes, not poisonous and thankfully a foot or less in length, otherwise neither my husband nor myself would be alive to share this story with you because we would have died from fright. They were found by walking downstairs or around a corner and there it was on the floor--appeared out of nowhere, but somewhere. Then someone, probably one of our sons (it sure wasn't me), had to relocate the snake to a new home outside. We have a house rule: all animals (not our pets) deserve to live, but they must live outside. This includes wasps. Yes, wasps. They find holes in a couple screens in the summer--or this past warm December--and find a way inside. Then we usually get the wasp to crawl onto a piece of paper and then quickly run it outside. We think Emerson is a Wasp Whisperer as he can pick them up by their wings and not get stung. It makes me nervous to watch him though I know the worst that can happen is that he'll be stung, but he loves it. I wonder, does he do it because he is able or because he knows it makes me nervous?

Last year my husband and I were drifting off to sleep. Actually, I was drifting, he was asleep. I heard scurrying sounds in the walls over my head, as I had for several weeks. I figured it was mice and no big deal. I chalked it up, as we always to do, to living in the country and continued to drift. I then heard a definite "ping." No longer drifting, instantly awake. What the heck was that? I laid there determining what the ping was and where it came from, figuring it must have been the ceiling fan. Before I could figure out what it was, I began to hear a whirring noise. It sounded like it came closer then went away, repeatedly. I barely peeked out from under my pillow and I let my eyes adjust to the dark, it took a few seconds. I could see a shape flying around in circles around the fan and knew it was a bat. (We had a similar experience several years ago when we lived in Maine and a bat was in Spencer's bedroom, he was then 6. We heard a scared little boy voice calling, "Papa, Mama, there's something in my room!"). I woke up Scott who couldn't believe he had to get up and relocate a bat outside. He grabbed a bath towel to trap it and threw it. He missed. He missed again. The bat, now disturbed, abandoned its circular pattern and flew helter-skelter all over the room. I stayed under the covers with them pulled up tight to my neck. I offered support and encouragement, "Honey, get it! Don't kill it!" Scott swung the towel again and the bat got stuck inside. Whew. He grabbed his parcel and went downstairs, opened the front door and opened the towel outside. Another critter successfully relocated.

President Bush Said...

Yesterday President Bush attended a Democratic congressional retreat in Williamsburg, Virginia, the first he attended since 2001. In last night's news on NPR, it was reported that President Bush said the war in Iraq is "sapping our soul." This quote struck me; it resonated with my strong personal feelings opposing the war in Iraq. I actually agreed with him--and that surprised me. Yet it didn't sound like something he would say unless it was, perhaps, coming from a religious perspective. If the President truly believes the war is sapping our soul, how could he possibly commit 21,500 more troops to Iraq? Could there be a glimmer of hope that he is waking up, or is it more likely that he said something to appease the crowd of Democrats? The soul-sapping war will begin its fifth year in just six weeks.

Read the article which mentions the quote: Bush Puts 'ic' Back in 'Democrat Party' (The Associated Press).